Life can be Messy, but we just need to clean it up ourselves!
 

 October 13, 2003

Life can be a strange and wonderful thing; it's filled with all sorts of mysterious twists and unexpected turns. Often time's people mistake mishaps for bad luck or that life has been unjust to them, but I truly feel its Gods way of teaching us life's little lessons that we all have to go through. It's up to the individual to make the decision to turn a bad situation into a positive one. In the past I have let every little thing worry me, it's been a hard lesson to get through my head that I need to only take control of things that are in my hands and leave the rest up to God. As a disabled woman, there are times that I feel frustrated that I'm not able to do what cable body woman can possibly do. For an example, take care of "women's duties" such as cooking, cleaning and typical things that woman do. But I have come to realize the true meaning of being in love. It's not all black and white; it's all kinds of shades. What one may not be able to do, the other one may and the vice versa. It just takes time to learn actually what each partner can do. May not be the quote traditional roles of Men and Women, but you adjust to what you and your partner is capable of doing for himself or herself. Being with someone has to be a partnership between two people, and do not expect it to be all peaches and cream. Yes, for heavens sake, you are going to have moments where someone is not going to agree and have some arguments alone the way, but that's how people find out how well they work situations out and to learn if they can truly withstand the confrontation, that is the true test. People need to realize that it takes hard work and commitment towards one another to make the relationship work. The one very important thing is always communicate with one another no matter what it is; it could be a insignificant thing, but if it is eating away at you it can turn into something much more significant later on down the road. For myself, I know I have let things build up because I feel I don't want to bother or make anyone upset with me, I hate anyone to be angry or disappointed in me, so I tend to not say what's on my mind, that's very hard on a relationship. I'm trying to change that, not only for him, but for me as well. My life has changed since I have found my best friend and the love of my life. It's so amazing how things fall into place. We both work together to make this relationship stay on the right course, not that it's always easy to do, but we do love each other enough to work together and make things work for us. In our relationship, patience and compromise is a big factor also. If I'm not able to do something for myself, my boyfriend and I find other ways for me to do things on my own. If it is too complicated, then I have him or someone else make it possible for me to do it on my own. Sometimes I know I can be bull headed and not want to ask for help, it's not that I feel I won't get the help, I think it's more that I feel a little out of control. The one thing he has said time and time again is to ask for help, but it's has been hard for me to do because he does so much for me that I hate to ask more from him. The one thing I do not want to happen with our relationship is to get to where he feels he has to do it all for me. The one thing I want to get across is that it takes a lot of patience and commitment, but if it is truly meant to be all the triumphs and tribulations that we endure has and will be all worth it if it's truly love